Wide Age Gap Between Two Kids – Benefits, Challenges and Parenting Tips

Managing two kids with a huge age gap is not easy for most parents. They often find it difficult to juggle the needs between the two children. In such cases, parents have to be sensitive to their requirements. They have to make extra efforts to reach out to both their children. The situation can be tricky and knotty at times.

Parents can face overwhelming challenges while raising kids with a wide age gap. They might face testing times while dealing with their toddler crying, night-time feedings, teething or toilet training, and dealing with the other sibling’s needs like homework, playtime, and other after-school activities.

There are several benefits and challenges of raising children with a wide age gap.

Here are the Benefits:

Exclusive Attention

A wide age gap between kids can help parents to give special attention to each child’s needs. They can also afford to spend more time with each kid. For instance, you can play with your toddler when the older child is in school, or help him to complete his homework when the tiny tot naps.

Trim Down Aggressiveness

Age gaps can diminish competitiveness between two siblings. With large gaps, the siblings are usually at separate schools, have different friends, and have distinct hobbies and goals. They are less expected to vie for parental attention. Parents can effortlessly solve their fights if one of the children is older. Parents can also egg on their siblings to bond closer and encourage them to have a healthy relationship.

Ample Respite

Parents get more respite if there is a wider spacing between kids. They are more relaxed, well-rested, and calm now as they enthusiastically begin their parenting with the new baby again. They have more patience and wiser now to handle their baby’s sleepless nights, feeding, endless changing of diapers, cranky behavior, and calming their crying baby.

Looking After Little One

Your older child can look after your little one while you are doing your household chores. You can do your cooking or make a quick phone call or prepare a coffee for yourself while the older kid plays with the tiny tot. You can complete your household tasks easily.

Decrease Anxiety

Parents would have less financial pressure for managing both their kids having a wide age gap. They will now worry less and be more comfortable paying for child care, medical expenses, or school fees.

Quality Time

You can spend some quality time with the newest member of the family. While the older child goes to school, you can spend some time developing a bond and showering love and affection to the little one.

Developing Attachment

A wide age gap means the older child is most likely to develop a strong bond with the baby. Attachment grows as the older one attempts to feed the tiny tot with the bottle or when he pacifies the baby during long journeys or as he tries to grab the attention of the little one by telling him stories.

Learning Responsibility

Your older child will learn to be more responsible and sensitive. He will know how to take care of the little one’s needs. The older one will be a mentor to the tiny tot. The little one will learn to be smart and will try to follow all the big kid activities. The younger one will adjust and adapt to a new environment easily.

Become Independent

Your older child will gradually become self-sufficient as he tries to get himself some snacks or play on his own for some time.

Different Toys

Big age gaps mean your children won’t be fighting over the same toys. They will probably play with different toys, and you will be saved from the hassle of being a mediator.

More Attachment

Big age gaps mean your older child will be more attached to you as you have already developed a strong bond with him before the new one arrived.

Double Expenses

You can avoid the expenses of buying a pram or a playmat or little toys. You can use the older ones’ things and avoid doubling up the expenses as the older ones may not be using them anymore.

Now Let’s Look at the Challenges:

Different Needs

Sometimes parents may have to face tough times meeting their kids’ different needs. It’s evening time and your toddler might insist on taking a nap at home while the older sibling might be adamant about playing cricket outside. Juggling the needs of both the kids is tricky. At this time, you can take the support of your partner or your relatives.

Diverse Activities

Going to movies or to gaming zones in malls or to some food joints becomes challenging with children having wide age gap differences. Your older child might insist on going to a fast food joint while the younger one might insist on visiting malls and play games.

Other than the above benefits and challenges, I also have a list of parenting tips that might help you. Let’s take a look at them:

Plan Activities on the Same Day

You can plan different activities on the same day. For instance, you can first visit a fast food joint or to a pizza eatery where your older child could enjoy the meal and then go to a mall where your preschooler kid could play games. You can also plan family vacations with your kids and take them out to a beach where you can engage your kids with different activities, games, and sports.

Empathy to Older Child

Show sympathy and compassion to your older child’s needs. Make your child understand that his younger sibling is still learning the language and developing social-emotional skills. Provide solutions to him as to how to handle younger sibling’s challenging behaviors. Be sympathetic to him when he expresses his annoyance with his younger sibling. Do not assume that your child would always part with his things.

Develop Positive Skills

Try to develop positive skills in the younger child. If he is seen emulating the dance moves of his elder brother, you may not like it. Attempt to make your older sibling understand that it is not right for his younger sibling to develop such interests at an early age. Avoid mollycoddling your younger child. You can give your kids simple household chores. Your older child can clean his cupboard while your little one can just keep his toys in the basket. Such simple chores can develop a child’s mental abilities positively.

Planning Individual Activities:

Often parents tend to pay more attention to younger siblings’ needs. Though the older child often tends to be protective about his younger sibling, he is still a child. Parents need to understand that they cannot ignore their older child’s needs. Try to plan an outing with each of your kids. You can visit a museum or attend a sports meet with your older child while you can go to some eatery or to Mc Donald’s, or to parks with your tiny tot. You can exchange your visits with your partner.

Parenting children with having wide age gap is a continuous challenge. With a positive approach, you can handle situations constructively and see encouraging growth in your children. All you need is patience and wisdom to handle situations effectively. The joy of raising kids even after having large age gaps then becomes a pleasure!